The answer was unanimous and somber: No.
No, for me, because I didn't really know what I wanted to be when I was 15. I only knew what I didn't want to be (a lawyer).
I realized what my calling was when I entered grad school. Before then, I only had a vague idea of what I wanted to happen, not for myself but for the world, or at least my country. Yup, it was that grand.
It still is. But now...where am I now? (This was getting to be a tough discussion for a Monday night at Starbucks.)
The answer is, I don't know. Not really. I do know that I have many unfilled dreams. Goals that are still unmet. Sometimes I feel a sense of panic thinking about them. I want to do so many things, and I have little patience and an increasingly short attention span. I have phases that run as quick as one week; other times I develop an obsession that goes on for months, and then fizzles out when something else commands my attention. Like right now, I'm bored with this topic and want to move on.
Flighty, inattentive, irresponsible, childish, indecisive, unfocused, fickle-minded, capricious, unstable. That's what I am. I'm still trying to find where that got me after 15 years.
*written July 9, 2012
